Relationships Take Work. Even the easiest, simplest relationship takes work sometimes. Getting in a fight or having to work through things doesn’t mean that it’s a bad relationship, it’s completely normal. How you deal with the turmoil is what determines a bad relationship.
Here are 10 tips for keeping your relationship healthy:
Speak Up. Tell your partner (or friends) how you’re feeling. Did they do something that you didn’t like or that made you uncomfortable? Tell them. You and your partner are different people, and they might not even know that they’re doing something that bothers you.
Ask For Help. Just like the previous point, sometimes your partner doesn’t know that you need help. Speak up and ask for help, whether it’s with a chore around the house or something bigger, never be afraid to ask for help.
Have Healthy Boundaries. The healthiest relationships have a certain set of boundaries and a certain amount of privacy. It’s healthy to spend time apart, have your own groups of friends, and occasionally go out and have fun without your partner. It’s also healthy to have a certain amount of privacy, or else your partner can feel smothered or like they’re always being questioned.
Appreciate One Another. Be grateful that you found each other and be grateful that you have each other. Don’t look at what your partner didn’t do, but focus on what they did do and be thankful for it. Take a minute every day to say thank you for the little things.
Do Things From When You Started Dating. We all tend to get comfortable in relationships and let certain things go. We become less patient and understanding and tend to put less effort into our relationship (it’s totally normal!). But a big part of keeping the romance alive is to do the things you and your partner did when you started dating. Did you guys have a favorite restaurant you would go to every Friday night? Have a date night and go there again. Remember the little things you used to do and start doing them again.
“Go to Bed Angry”. They always say “don’t go to bed angry”, but sometimes that causes more harm than good. Depending on the relationship, some couples like to talk things out when they’re angry, but some couples need space and time to themselves before they want to talk. It doesn’t sound like the nicest thing, but going to bed angry is ok, because 9/10 times you’ll wake up calmer and happier, and you and your partner will be able to talk without fighting. Disagreeing is Ok. You won’t agree about everything, and that’s ok! You can disagree on tons of things and still have a healthy relationship. As long as you share the same core values and love your partner for who they truly are, the rest doesn’t matter.
Being Happy is Better Than Being Right. This one might be hard to hear, but sometimes in a relationship you need to suck it up and apologize, even if you don’t want to or if you don’t think you did anything wrong. Being together and being happy is much more important than “winning” the argument or being right.
Remember That We All Change Over Time. This one is especially for those relationships going through high school or college. People change over time, sometimes in small ways and sometimes in huge ways. Changes can be challenging, but as long as you still love the person for who they are, your relationship will thrive.